Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Overloaded

I know I haven’t been around in a bit.  I’m not going back to my old ways, I’ve just been busy.  I should have a few free minutes tomorrow, so I’ll post a recap of what’s been happening then.

Posted by amy t. @ 03:59 PM in • For The Money · (0) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Friday, August 22, 2008

Who Am I?

It’s like I don’t even know myself anymore.  Two years ago I would have thought these were hideous.  Now I’ve got a burning desire to own them. 

Where’s a good sugar daddy when you need him?

And how sad is it that I need a sugar daddy to buy me a $23 pair of shoes?

Posted by amy t. @ 07:14 AM in • The Friday Files · (0) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Thursday, August 21, 2008

A Few Notes To The Universe

Dear Mother Nature,

Any time you want to end the rain, go right ahead.  It’s been raining for days.  It’s supposed to rain every day for another week.  While I appreciate the fact that it gave me another opportunity to wear my wellies today, I’m still way, way, WAY over the rain.

There’s no Noah here, so please move along.

Let the sunshine in,

MissDirected

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Dear Sam’s Club,

I love you so.  Only there can one go in empty handed and come out with 20 pounds of various meats for not much over $50.  Not only that, but 20 pounds of meat jammed into a box for Degree deoderant.  People at work think I’m crazy now.

GO MEAT!

MissDirected

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Dear Thursday,

For the love of all that is good, please speed the fuck up.  I’m so ready to be out of here.  I have bitchin’ Friday Syndrome, due in large part to the fact that this place is like a freaking ghost town this afternoon.  Hardly anyone is here.  I’ve finished my manual for this week and really am not ready to start the next one - one ENGINEERS described as being horribly written.  If they think it’s bad, my head might explode when I try to read it.  So please?  Pretty please?  Speed up and make it 6 already so I can go home?

I now have Jack McFarland imitating Cher singing “If I Could Turn Back Time” in my head,

MissDirected

Posted by amy t. @ 03:38 PM in • Dead Letter Office · (0) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Balancing Out

Well, I guess my body is getting used to the herbal supplements I’m taking.  For the first two weeks, I was forcing myself into bed by 1 a.m.  Last night I barely made it to 11:30.  I’m feeling drained this week.  I know part of it is the weather - it’s been raining and cloudy all week.  We’re actually not schedule to see any sun until next Wednesday.  It’s like winter in South Bend - only instead of snow we have humidity.  Fun times.  Anyway, I’m tired.  Yesterday after lunch I suddenly felt as if my body had filled with lead.  Every step took a colossal effort.  My boss was in a closed-door meeting for a couple of hours, but when he saw me at 5, he took one look at me and told me to go home.  I forced myself to eat some dinner but I didn’t come close to getting in all my food yesterday.  And today I still feel drained.  The leaden feeling has abated some, but the fact that both my alarms were going off for about 12 minutes before I registered them does not bode well for how I’ll be feeling this afternoon. 

I hope I somehow manage to get a nap in today at lunch.

Posted by amy t. @ 07:26 AM in • Imitation of Life · (0) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Monday, August 18, 2008

Random

I know this image is several days old, but every time the networks show the clip of Michael Phelps winning the freestyle relay and moving on in his Quest! For! History!, I can think only one thing…

Posted by amy t. @ 01:38 PM in · (2) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Lighter

Well, today I hit my first real milestone with my diet.  Today, just 16 days after I started this program, I am down just over 10 pounds.  That’s 20% of my goal.  While 20% doesn’t seem like something to get excited about to some, it’s huge for me.  I’ve been struggling with my weight for more than half of my life, and it has never been easy - not even in the beginning.  I’m not one of those people who drops five pounds just because I switch from soda to water.  I’m not one of those that can really change my body just be changing my eating habits.  In the past, I’ve struggled for every tenth of a pound.  I have no doubt that eventually my pace will decrease.  Just from week one to week two I slowed down.  But I have never had weight loss seem so effortless to me.  Instead of thinking about how hungry I am, I’m worried about making sure I get all my food in.  Instead of stuffing my face with prepackaged, easy to fix crap, I’m eating fresh everything, and the only thing I’m worried about is whether I’ll eat all my broccoli and grapes before they have a chance to go bad.  While I used to be worried about credit card debt, I’m now worried about if I have enough money to buy the two pounds of chicken and 12 tomatoes I need this week (tomatoes are my favorite vegetable, and therefore make it easy to get in my four veggie servings a day).  I guess money is something everyone worries about, regardless of how their life may change. 

Because I’m supposed to lose all my weight over a relatively short amount of time, I’m trying really hard not to go shopping.  I can feel the loss in my clothes now.  A pair of jeans that usually fit my waist for the first few wears now need a belt right out of the dryer.  My bras are getting hooked tighter.  I’ve felt okay in clothing I haven’t worn in months.  And today, my shorts didn’t pop.  Whenever I weigh, I put on a pair of light weight khaki shorts from my clothing archives.  They have a snap closure.  Usually, when I put them on and then bend over to pick up my jeans, the snap pops open.  Today it stayed snapped.  I did a little dance of joy in the bathroom for that.  In another 5 or so pounds, my closet will be my shopping trip.  Before I started this diet, at least 60% of the stuff in my closet didn’t fit.  This weekend I tried on a skirt that I couldn’t button a few months ago.  It buttons now, and I could wear it, but I’d like a little more breathing room first.  My birthday pants from Pants will soon fit again.  So yeah, looking forward to that and trying not to shop.  But I’m a girl.  And I like to shop.  So this weekend I rewarded myself. 

I only spent $22.  I think that’s pretty good.  I got a shirt and a dress that will both fit me for a while, I think.  And I promised myself I wouldn’t wear either until I got past the first 10 pounds.  I actually think I might put the dress away until I reach 15.  That should only be another 10 days, at most, so I think that’s fair.  Rewarding yourself is a great motivator, and rewarding myself with clothing is much better than rewarding myself with food.  Although I will say this - I’ve already decided that in addition to the mass amounts of vodka I’ll probably drink in Dallas in a couple of weeks, I’m also going to allow myself a Steak and Shake burger.  And a small fry.  A decision I’ll probably regret, but it’s something I get to eat, what, once a year? 

So yeah, the diet is going great.  With the exception of the constant grocery shopping and cooking it feels pretty effortless, really.  And I’m happier with myself than I’ve been in a long time.  In April of 2007, I hired a personal trainer because i was miserable in my skin at 185 pounds.  Now, I’m ten pounds heavier than that, but because I can see the changes in my body already, I think I’ll probably throw a party at 185.  Okay, that’s a lie.  No party until 179, which will be 25 pounds.  At that point, I’m treating myself to a pair of Guess shoes that I try on every time I see them anywhere.  Anyway, now I think I’ll look awesome at 185, rather than like a beached whale.  It’s funny how weight is relative like that, I guess.

Posted by amy t. @ 01:00 PM in • Just Eat It · (2) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Friday, August 15, 2008

This Day Will Last 1,000 Years

It’s not even 9 and I’m bored shitless.  Sarah has left the state, so I’m Pantsless (not to be confused with ppantsless - pants I have).  My partner in crime at work is off on Fridays.  So is Kizmo.  Drunk Brunch is away from NYC, sans laptop.  My boss is out, which means I’m not extremely motivated. 

Is it 6 p.m. yet?

Posted by amy t. @ 07:52 AM in • The Friday Files · (0) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Just Keep Swimming...

Does anyone else find this comment as funny as I do?

Most of this takes place below water, but he’s also so good above water he makes everyone else look like they’re going backwards!

About Aaron Piersol, during the 100m BACKstroke.

Posted by amy t. @ 08:27 AM in • Hearsay · (0) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

I Am A Morning Goddess

Today, my eyes snapped open at 7:43.  I jumped up, grabbed some clothes, brushed my teeth, grabbed my lunch, took out Sophie and hit the road.  I pulled into work at 8:12.  That, my friends, takes skill. 

Posted by amy t. @ 07:28 AM in • For The Money • Imitation of Life · (1) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Monday, August 11, 2008

Nervous

There are some things going on at work that are about to be addressed by me.  We had a regime change recently, which left me with my second new manager in as many months.  My new boss, someone I’ve always felt comfortable discussing work stuff with (he used to be the head of my department, moved, and is now back), is suddenly intimidating as hell to me.  Not because he’s making me feel intimidated, but because bosses, in general, intimidate me.  They have The Power.  After being laid off twice and having my next manager make it her mission to kill my social life, The Power scares me to death for some reason.  Part of this, of course, is my own fault.  I haven’t been the most stellar employee the last few months, and inside I’m just waiting for someone to notice and all hell to break loose. 

When I gave up fast food for three months, I learned not to miss it.  But that first bite of that first greasy and horribly unhealthy whatever (I can’t remember, but I think it may have been a sausage mcmuffin) brought my love of greasy unhealthy whatevers back in force.  Well, that’s how it’s been for me at work lately.  I was given a project a few months ago that was geared both towards my actual degree and what I love doing.  I worked my ass off on that project.  And then I went back to doing my normal job.  Only now, my normal job seems so boring and depressing.  I didn’t even know how much I missed using my brain until I flexed it a little (every brain needs some flexion now and then!)

I’ve spoken with HR about my feelings.  Our HR rep has known for a while that I am anxious to move on from my current position - mostly because I started interviewing for other internal positions and also reminding her that I was told I wouldn’t be expected to be in my current job for longer than two years. Two years is up in 17 days.  When I was given the project earlier this year, I was told by a higher up that what I was doing could possibly turn into a full time gig for me.  Recently, I spoke to him again about that, and he told me that there is a lot more of that sort of work heading my way over the next few months.  That of course makes me ask, “What happens to my other work then?” Because if given a choice between doing what I love doing and filing 600 documents, guess what’s not getting done?  There used to be two people in my position.  Well, to be fair, really one and a half, as one of the girls split her time between two departments.  But now there is only me.  And now I am getting overwhelmed.  And I’m getting lazy.

Nobody is anxious to do a job they are beginning to loathe.  I find myself surfing more, chatting more around the office, and staring into space more.  I either need someone to come and take the menial, mindless, crap work away from me and let me grow into a new position, or I need to start looking for something more challenging.  In a brief encounter with my manager today, I asked him if he had some time available tomorrow to meet with me.  I nearly threw up once the words were out of my mouth.  He said of course he has time.  So tomorrow I will be sitting down behind closed doors with a guy that’s only been my manager for a few weeks and basically telling him I don’t want to do my job anymore.  Maybe I won’t put it quite like that, but my heart just isn’t in what I’m doing, and that’s not good for anyone involved.  I’m too valuable of an employee for them to waste me doing data entry and filing.  And I feel like I’ve put in my dues in this position.  I’ve been very involved in some very big overhauls of company systems.  I’ve come up with ideas to reduce paper and increase efficiency.  I’ve done what I can in this role.  And now, I’m just kinda done. 

I probably won’t sleep tonight, and I’ll probably feel sick to my stomach until this meeting is done tomorrow.  I just hope that I manage to remember that this is a man that knows all my beef with my job - I always went to him when I had troubles with my manager or needed guidance on how to handle something in the department.  So he knows.  And he’s a really nice guy, and from what I can tell, a great boss.  I just hope I remember that.  And I hope I don’t throw up on his desk.

Posted by amy t. @ 03:44 PM in • For The Money · (1) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Friday, August 08, 2008

It's Tough Being An Advertising Geniarse

Dear HEB,

Perhaps when trying to devise a radio commercial aimed at a target demographic of high school students, you should rethink your strategy.  I really don’t think your best plan of attack is to use the voice of an adult woman.  Let’s face it - teenagers think anyone over 26 is old, boring, and out of touch.  Even worse than just using her voice is having an ad that tries to come up with hip lingo.  Most kids are not all “WOO! SCHOOL!” I mean, I liked school, but I liked summer more.  Anyway, deeming it “getting ready for B2S” and then having her say in a conspiratorial “I’m so cool and I want you to be cool like me so I’m gonna let you in on a little secret” way that B2S stands for Back To School probably ensured that everyone in your target audience just rolled their eyes and changed the channel.

Your ad is more like B to the S.

I’m just sayin’,

MissDirected

Posted by amy t. @ 07:54 AM in • Dead Letter Office • The Friday Files · (1) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Thursday, August 07, 2008

Um...

I don’t really have anything to say today, but in an effort to get back into posting regularly, I’m posting that I don’t have anything to say.

So there.

Posted by amy t. @ 03:40 PM in • Imitation of Life · (0) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Wednesday, August 06, 2008

Well Don't You Know That Other Kids Are Starving In Japan?

Monday after I posted things went rapidly downhill.  I went to weigh in, and then hit the grocery store for a few things I needed already.  The headache started getting worse.  By 9:30, I was sitting in the dark.  It felt like there was a spotlight two feet in front of my face, despite the lack of any substantial light in the room.  Then the nausea kicked in.  I couldn’t take any more headache tablets because my stomach was going nuts.  I threw up my dinner.  By 11, I was in bed with a cold cloth over my eyes and a bag of frozen corn wrapped in a t-shirt under the back of my neck.  When I woke up Tuesday, the headache had abated some, but still lingered.  The mere thought of going to work and sitting under the rows of glaring, uncovered fluorescent lights made my stomach turn.  I called in sick.

Good thing.  Picture a woman with a severe, scary case of PMS, then multiply it.  By 100.  There I was.  Things were alternately sending me into a rage or into tears.  I was a total mess.  Having a 40-hour headache can do that to you, I guess.  I slept a good bit of the day just trying to hibernate through the pain.  By 7, the headache, which had remained at a consistent medium rated throb, started to increase.  I couldn’t take it any more.  I cheated.  I had a cup of tea.  With a sweet ‘n’ low.  And a tablespoon of milk.  I couldn’t even make it three days.

I felt almost immediately better once I’d drunk the tea.  I guessed I’d have trouble sleeping, so I took a melatonin and was in bed by 11.  This morning, I jumped out of bed, full of energy and a renewed zest for life.

Because this morning I could have TOAST.

That’s right folks.  Heaven exists, and it tastes like crunchy bread with a teaspoon of butter on it.  I have more energy today, that’s for sure, and the chicken I had for lunch sits at the right hand of toast in heaven. 

This afternoon at lunch, I went to weigh in.  I figured that after only three days, I shouldn’t expect much.  I’ve lost five pounds.  FIVE.  In three days.  After the last three days, now that I can have so much more food and have so many more options, I feel like this diet won’t be too hard to stick to.  I’m sure I’ll reach a point in a few weeks where I take that back, but for the moment, I’m optimistic.  Because five pounds?  That almost makes the headache worth it. 

Posted by amy t. @ 01:37 PM in · (0) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Work Hard, Play Hard

I was reading this article about the 10 most conservative schools in the country.  I clicked on the article because I recognized the picture that accompanied the headline - it was the famous Golden Dome, a site I am became vastly familiar with during my long treks through the cemetery and down Rape Road to the Grotto on my way to see BCoop and all my favorite St. Ed’s (lovably known as Steds) guys every weekend in college.  Anyway, I understand that Notre Dame is considered a conservative school, but I think that is really only on the surface.  I mean, yes, they are a religious university, and sports are a major part, and there are no frats or sororities, which seems to be what the designation was based on.  But requiring one semester of religious studies doesn’t turn all the students into Jesusfreaks, the sports are legendary, and the dorms themselves have the brother or sisterhood associated with the Greek system.  Rarely does one switch dorms at Notre Dame.  Intramural sports get just as much emphasis as the football program (though the funding is considerably less).  Dorm parties can be legendary.  SYRs as well. (An SYR is a dance.  Every dorm has one.  Basically it’s a dorm-wide party, with different rooms hosting different themes.  I don’t think anyone knows what SYR originally stood for, but it is now considered to stand for Screw Your Roommate*) I guess what I’m saying is that while Notre Dame may be famous for it’s sports program, the kids there are very intelligent and they work their asses off to be the best.  And when the week is over, and it’s Friday night, they party like they deserve to.  And then, after stumbling to the Student Center for quarter dogs at 2 a.m., they crawl into bed and set their alarms.  After all, that kegs and eggs tailgater starts at 6:30 a.m.

* This term comes from freshman year.  Every freshman receives what is known as “The Dog Book,” a book with the photos, names, and dorms of every other freshman.  SYR comes from the thought that you should flip through the book and pick out someone for your roommate to call and invite to the party/dance.  Sometimes this can go very, very wrong.  Hence, you’ve Screwed Your Roommate.

Posted by amy t. @ 07:12 AM in • Imitation of Life · (1) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Surprising Even Myself

"How do you know that’s the mom.  Why can it not be the dad?”

“Because I saw the kittens nursing.”

“So?”

“So I’m pretty sure they weren’t sucking daddy’s dick.”

I just don’t know where it comes from sometimes…

Posted by amy t. @ 08:14 PM in • Hearsay · (0) Comments · (0) Trackbacks ·